Please dating someone with mild aspergers this error screen to 64. Husband a right old grump? Teacher Sandra Beale-Ellis, from Herne Bay, Kent, was surprised to recognise some of the traits of Asperger’s in her 50-year-old husband, Joe.
Read this: Husband a right old grump? When martial arts teacher Sandra Beale-Ellis discovered one of the children in her class had Asperger’s syndrome, she set out to discover more about the condition. I’d seen the film Rain Man, but that was the extent of my knowledge about autism,’ says Sandra, 44, who lives in Herne Bay, Kent. So I bought a book about Asperger’s to read up about it. Autism is a developmental disability causing difficulties with communication and relating to other people. Learning about its classic characteristics — social awkwardness, a love of detail and repetition, and a tendency for obsessions and collecting — Sandra was surprised to recognise some of the traits in her husband, Joe, 50. Joe, who is the founder of Kent Karate Schools, a string of martial arts academies in Kent, owns hundreds of salt shakers he has been collecting since he was ten, which sit in neat rows in their house.
He is also obsessed with castles and runs an online tearoom review site. Sandra grew more interested, and signed up for a postgraduate certificate in Asperger’s. That was when the lightbulb moment came. One of my tutors said people with autism and Asperger’s often have sensitivity to light, touch, colour or taste,’ says Sandra. Joe hates clothes against his skin and would strip off to his T-shirt and underwear the minute he got home, even in winter.
He hates the colour red and bright lights. I’d always called them Joe-isms. Now I realised they were signs of Asperger’s. Joe was sceptical, but after two years of persuasion, he saw a psychologist and after a three-hour interview he was diagnosed with mild Asperger’s. But, incredibly, there was more to come. Though Asperger’s is significantly more common in men than women, as Sandra sat in on Joe’s interview she felt pangs of recognition. It was like a checklist of my own past,’ she says.
Like Joe, I love detail, order and lists. I was in the top group for most subjects at school, but I didn’t understand fashion or dolls or boyfriends, so was often left in the corner with my book. I didn’t have any friends. In the two years after Joe’s diagnosis, several people on the postgraduate course asked Sandra if she thought she, too, might have Asperger’s.